THE NOONDAY DEMON: AN ATLAS OF DEPRESSION: ANDREW SOLOMON

I actually heard Solomon talking about another book on the John Stewart Daily Show but this National Book Award Winner was alluded to and I thought it would be both interesting and informative.  It's clearly not about a very happy subject, depression, but Solomon, who also suffers from this disease, speaks about it in both personal and clinical terms, so that he makes it understandable to the laymen, to the sufferer of depression as well.

This is not an easy book to read, mostly because depression is so debilitating and there's no easy cure to it as Solomon's experience shows.  He writes about it poetically, comparing depression to a vine that winds itself around a tree, slowly almost unknowingly choking off its life.  He also compares mild depression, the kind that does not require hospitalization as as a "soul of iron that weathers with grief and rusts with mild depression...it takes time for the rusting iron-framed building to collapse, but the rust is ceaselessly powdering the solid, thinning it, eviscerating it. The collapse (large depression), no matter how abrupt it may feel, is the cumulative consequence of decay."  He continues:  "Depression starts out insipid, fogs the day into a dull color, weakens ordinary actions until their clear shapes are obscured by the effort they require, leaves you tired and bored and self-obsessed.  The worst part, the sense that you are a burden to others, that you don't count, a belief that must be fought and experience shows, is not accurate or true.  Most people, especially family, are sympathetic and caring, willing to help in any way they can.  Often, however, the sufferer, does not see this, so obsessed are they in their condition, making it difficult to see clearly and truthfully."

For Solomon, "depression was both a birth and death.  The vine is what is born.  The death is one's decay, the cracking of the branches that support this misery.  The first thing to go is happiness.   You cannot gain pleasure from anything...but soon other emotions follow happiness into oblivion: sadness as you had known it, the sadness that seemed to have led you here; your sense of humor; your belief in the capacity for love.  Your mind is leached until you seem dim-witted even to yourself.  All these images describe, forcefully, the depression most feel.  The road back to health involves hacking through the vines, with drug therapy but that's only half of the problem, the rest comes from the individual, perhaps with a therapist.  Rebuilding of the self in and after depression requires love, insight, work, and most of all, time."

I found most compelling his description of the self, "neither peach, with a solid core, hidden by the fruit, or an onion, which once the skin is peeled, nothing remains."  For Solomon, "There is no essential self that lies pure as a vein of gold under the chaos of experience and chemistry.  Anything can be changed, and we must understand the human organism as a sequence of selves that succumb or choose one another.  Thus, we are constantly changing, the self is never the same and for someone in therapy, treatment does not alleviate a disruption of identity, bringing you back to some kind of normality; it readjusts a multifarious identity, changing in some small degree who you are. So, we can never go back to who we were; we change, a result of experience, perhaps chemistry, constantly renewing our identities, according to the choices we make and their consequences."

Three percent of Americans suffer from depression, some 19 million and it's growing.  And it may be the biggest killer on earth, greater than cancer or heart disease.  And two million of those who suffer are children.  Suffering from depression, for Solomon, became a way of life, too.  "Depression is something to do."  He quotes Schopenhauer:  "We find pleasure much less pleasurable, pain much more painful than we had anticipated...we require at all times a certain quantity of care or sorrow or want, as a ship requires ballast, to keep on a straight course."  Interesting thought, reinforcing Zorba's belief that 'life is trouble.'  And a Russian proverb reinforces this view: "If you wake up feeling no pain, you know you're dead."  Not very encouraging for any of us.

"LET US MAKE NO BONES ABOUT IT.  WE DO NOT REALLY KNOW WHAT CAUSES DEPRESSION.  WE DO NOT REALLY KNOW WHAT CONSTITUTES DEPRESSION.  WE DO NOT REALLY KNOW WHY CERTAIN TREATMENTS MAY BE EFFECTIVE FOR DEPRESSION.  WE DO NOT KNOW HOW DEPRESSION MADE IT THROUGH THE EVOLUTIONARY PROCESS.  WE DO NOT KNOW WHY ONE PERSON GETS DEPRESSION FROM CERTAIN CIRCUMSTANCES THAT DOES NOT TROUBLE ANOTHER.

In other words, depression is a baffling disease of the mind, one which we know little about, understand less, yet it affects millions of people.  And unfortunately, society has little room in it for moping.  Finally, he tries to answer the question how to treat the disease:

"We would all like Prozac to do it for us, but in my experience, Prozac doesn't do it unless WE HELP IT ALONG.  "Listen to the people who love you.  Believe that they are worth living for even when you don't believe it.  Seek out the memories depression takes away and project them into the future. Be brave; be strong; take your pills.  Exercise because it's good for you even if every step weighs a thousand pounds.  Eat when food itself disgusts you.  Reason with yourself when you have lost your reason."  He adds, "These fortune-cookie admonitions sound pat, but the surest way out of depression is to dislike it and not to let yourself grow accustomed to it.  Black out the terrible thoughts that invade your mind...I rebuilt myself enough to be able to keep swallowing my funeral instead of enacting it.  A lot of talking was involved.  I believe that words are strong, that they can overwhelm what we fear when fear seems more awful than life is good.  I have turned with an increasingly fine attention to love.  Love is the other way forward."  I think this is an amazingly strong and honest admonition from Solomon.

He quotes three mantras from a women who has suffered more than most (her family a victim of Pol Pot's genocide)  1. I teach them to forget; we can teach ourselves to forget the depression even though it is right there.  2.  I teach them to work, any kind of work, where they learn to do things well with pride.  3.  I teach them to love...themselves first, by taking pride in their physicality, then by interacting with others, to avoid the isolation of depression.  FORGETTING. WORKING. LOVING.

"Welcome pain, for you will learn from it," Ovid once said.  We all need pain to feel alive "but it is the walking-death quality of depression that we must try to eliminate from our lives.  There are always ways to lead a good life with depression," and the book is written as "an artillery against that depression."

Medication and therapy are the two tools most often used to combat depression; one without the other, however, is too often applied.  Both are often necessary for depression.

A sense of humor is, for Solomon, the best indicator that the sufferer will recover; exercise and diet also play an important role. And,  he adds, " A really serious workout is just about the most disgusting idea I can imagine when I am depressed, and it's no fun doing it, but afterward I always feel a thousand times better.  Exercise allays anxiety, too; nervous energy gets used up by sit-ups."

Finally, if YOU have a friend who is going through an episode of depression, do the following: "Blunt their isolation.  Do it with cups of tea or long talks or in sitting in a room nearby and staying silent or in whatever way suits the circumstances but do that. And do it willingly."

This is a book everyone should read.

Sunny, Cold, A Dash Of Snow Flurries

7:23

7:24

7:58

I slept in some,  till 7:20 which felt good.  The sun had yet to rise but the sky was pink along the coast line of Bemus.  A few guys were out fishing.  At the moment, it's 7:59 and I have listened to two podcasts, the novelist Isabelle Allende on 'Living Passionately,' and a podcast from NPR called 'Pop Culture Happy Hour,' about the novels of Nick Hornsby.  Both are pretty good, not too long, a good background to surfing the Internet.

Yesterday was one of those days where neither Evie nor I had much mojo, though we tried to push ourselves some but it did not work very well, alas.  I skipped yoga, made the excuse that my back was a bit sore, so I would take a few days off, forgetting the mantra, 'Do It Now.' We vowed to store our winter toys, skis, snow shoes, etc, and almost managed that, not quite.  My one task, a trip to the Transfer Station, was accomplished around 10:30.

Evie With A Bag Of Freebies

Grow Jamestown Expo

The city of Jamestown's Renaissance Center was having a Expo called Grow Jamestown.  And we wanted to stop at Sherwin Williams, so we decided to do something: drive to Jamestown.  And the Grow Jamestown was fun, fairly well attended, as any one having something to do with trees, gardens, lawns, landscaping, were there, giving away free pamphlets, and some goodies, like plant markers, seeds, whatever.  We walked and talked with the vendors for about a half hour, ended up buying nothing though the bakery, especially the cupcakes looked tasty.  It was worth the drive and fun to get out of our house.

The Man In Red

Downtown Jamestown

On the way to Sherwin Williams, because we knew we did not want to fuss with dinner, we ordered two large pizzas, $7.99 a piece from Pizza Hut via the Internet, then went to Sherwin Williams to talk about paint before driving to Pizza Hut 20 minutes later to pick up our pizzas, ready and warming in an oven.  On the way home, we had to fight the tendency to have a slice because they smelled so good,  We disciplined ourselves, even when we got home.  To placate me, Evie made toasted ham and cheese for lunch with the last of the leek and potato soup...a ham sure goes a long way.

The rest of the afternoon we just wasted, on our couches, either watching junk TV or March Madness, neither very satisfying.  I finally finished my novel, John Sanford's RULES OF PREY, a typical Lucas Davenport novel, with serial killers, chicks, and a screwed up police bureaucracy.  And started another thriller, KILL SHOT, by Vince Flynn, as we follow the CIA's trained assassin, Mitch Rapp. This is my third Mitch Rapp novel.

For dinner, Evie warmed up the pizza, made the salad, and we were happy, watching the end of Ohio State's disappointing loss to Arizona in the NCAA tournament.  Bored with basketball, we decided to watch a DVD which we just arrived from Netflix, called WHIPLASH.  It's about a young drummer, at a prestigious music school in New York, his passion for drumming, and his relationship with his teacher, a sadist or to be less generous, a psychopath.  Neither are your average Joes, as Andrew, played by an amazing Miles Teller, seemingly has no friends, no empathy, a weak sociopath perhaps, a vivid foil to his teacher.  It's an intense movie, both Evie and I were on the edges of our couch through much of the movie.  And the ending is puzzling until you think about it, both humiliation and triumph for both.  J.K. Simmons received the Academy Award for Best Actor for his role as the music teacher/conductor, Fletcher.  He's good, but not as good as Miles Teller, who played the student. Don't get me wrong, Simmons is good, too, as the hard nosed, take no prisoners music teacher, a sadistic football coach in the music room.  I did like his words of wisdom to young Andrew: "Do you know what  the two most destructive words in the English language are?  Good Job."  I like that and so true.  How many times have I told my students and players 'good job' when I did not mean it but did not want to be honest.

A Poem of Gratitude:

Otherwise

Jane Kenyon, 1947 - 1995

I got out of bed
on two strong legs.
It might have been
otherwise. I ate
cereal, sweet
milk, ripe, flawless
peach. It might
have been otherwise.
I took the dog uphill
to the birch wood.
All morning I did
the work I love.
At noon I lay down
with my mate. It might
have been otherwise.
We ate dinner together
at a table with silver
candlesticks. It might
have been otherwise.
I slept in a bed
in a room with paintings
on the walls, and
planned another day
just like this day.
But one day, I know,
it will be otherwise.

Hallelujah, It's Finally Spring

7:20

It 6:30 and certainly does not feel or look like spring, but it must be spring, the newspapers, radio, Internet, and television told me so.  It's 34º at the moment, and lots of rain/sleet is predicted for our first day of spring.  How apt.

Yesterday, I began the day with a snow covered drive to yoga in Lakewood, thinking noone would be there but I was wrong; we had six students, a good class, with variety which I like.  I stopped at Ryder's Cup for coffee, as the streets had melted, the windshield, so it was easy going.  When I got home, Evie was busy cleaning up the kitchen, trying to decide when to start painting our interiors.  I had a lunch of homemade vegetable soup and pizza, leftover from the Viking Club, and watched some of March Madness, something I am supposed to be doing in March I guess.

Cairn Still Standing

After lunch, I decided to take off, drop off my income tax info in Jamestown, then stopped at both Home Depot and Sherwin Williams to pick up color charts and check on the cost of their premier paints, and when they might be having a big sale.  Home Depots sale was not till Memorial Day, but Sherwin Williams, which was having a 30% off sale now, 40% from April 17th to the 20th.  I came home with mega folders on colors that supposedly complement each other and now the fun begins, trying to pick out a color.  My theory is to not agonize; look them over, then make a decision, quick.  Evie, however, will spend the weekend thinking about it, trying to find just the right combination, making herself miserable until she finally makes a decision, minutes before we have to buy the paint. I must say she usually ends up with the right color, however, I do remember painting our house back in the early 1990's and when we were done, she did not like the color much, nor did I.  We don't always make the right decision but have to live with it.

Late Afternoon

Frozen Lake, Blue Skies

When I got home, I spent the afternoon, alternating between watching some March Madness though I had little interest in the games, reading, and waiting for wine time to arrive, about 6:00 yesterday. We relaxed in our living room, the late afternoon, early evening sky the rival of any in Florida (where my sister is staying) or Zambia (where Evie's sisters are staying).  Evie made some nachos for an appetizer since we were having an easy dinner.

Still Fishing At Dusk

We had dinner, about the same time the fishermen called it quits, packed up their tents and went in, all but two, who 'stayed the course,' turned on their lanterns and continued fishing.  For dinner, Evie heated up the previous nights dinner, ham, cauliflower, and sweet potatoes, always as good as the previous night.  We watched two riveting episodes of The Americans and I wanted more.  We also had two slim pieces of the lemon meringue pie with two to go.

It's now 7:13, a heavy cloud cover over the lake, threatening like a summer storm, and  a few guys are out fishing already.  I am not sure of the safety of the lake but I assume it's still thick as we have not had much warm weather, thus the huge piles of snow from plows, dotting parking lots and driveways still.

New Think: I happened upon these words of wisdom (to live by) somewhere and liked them enough to include them on my blog... simple but profound:

The Four Agreements:

Be Impeccable With Your Words
Don't Take Anything Personally
Don't Make Assumptions
Always Do Your Best

THE NOONDAY DEMON: AN ATLAS OF DEPRESSION: ANDREW SOLOMON

I actually heard Solomon talking about another book on the John Stewart Daily Show but this National Book Award Winner was alluded to and I thought it would be both interesting and informative.  It's clearly not about a very happy subject, depression, but Solomon, who also suffers from this disease, speaks about it in both personal and clinical terms, so that he makes it understandable to the laymen, to the sufferer of depression as well.

This is not an easy book to read, mostly because depression is so debilitating and there's no easy cure to it as Solomon's experience shows.  He writes about it poetically, comparing depression to a vine that winds itself around a tree, slowly almost unknowingly choking off its life.  He also compares mild depression, the kind that does not require hospitalization as as a "soul of iron that weathers with grief and rusts with mild depression...it takes time for the rusting iron-framed building to collapse, but the rust is ceaselessly powdering the solid, thinning it, eviscerating it. The collapse (large depression), no matter how abrupt it may feel, is the cumulative consequence of decay."  He continues:  "Depression starts out insipid, fogs the day into a dull color, weakens ordinary actions until their clear shapes are obscured by the effort they require, leaves you tired and bored and self-obsessed.  The worst part, the sense that you are a burden to others, that you don't count, a belief that must be fought and experience shows, is not accurate or true.  Most people, especially family, are sympathetic and caring, willing to help in any way they can.  Often, however, the sufferer, does not see this, so obsessed are they in their condition, making it difficult to see clearly and truthfully."

For Solomon, "depression was both a birth and death.  The vine is what is born.  The death is one's decay, the cracking of the branches that support this misery.  The first thing to go is happiness.   You cannot gain pleasure from anything...but soon other emotions follow happiness into oblivion: sadness as you had known it, the sadness that seemed to have led you here; your sense of humor; your belief in the capacity for love.  Your mind is leached until you seem dim-witted even to yourself.  All these images describe, forcefully, the depression most feel.  The road back to health involves hacking through the vines, with drug therapy but that's only half of the problem, the rest comes from the individual, perhaps with a therapist.  Rebuilding of the self in and after depression requires love, insight, work, and most of all, time."

I found most compelling his description of the self, "neither peach, with a solid core, hidden by the fruit, or an onion, which once the skin is peeled, nothing remains."  For Solomon, "There is no essential self that lies pure as a vein of gold under the chaos of experience and chemistry.  Anything can be changed, and we must understand the human organism as a sequence of selves that succumb or choose one another.  Thus, we are constantly changing, the self is never the same and for someone in therapy, treatment does not alleviate a disruption of identity, bringing you back to some kind of normality; it readjusts a multifarious identity, changing in some small degree who you are. So, we can never go back to who we were; we change, a result of experience, perhaps chemistry, constantly renewing our identities, according to the choices we make and their consequences."

Three percent of Americans suffer from depression, some 19 million and it's growing.  And it may be the biggest killer on earth, greater than cancer or heart disease.  And two million of those who suffer are children.  Suffering from depression, for Solomon, became a way of life, too.  "Depression is something to do."  He quotes Schopenhauer:  "We find pleasure much less pleasurable, pain much more painful than we had anticipated...we require at all times a certain quantity of care or sorrow or want, as a ship requires ballast, to keep on a straight course."  Interesting thought, reinforcing Zorba's belief that 'life is trouble.'  And a Russian proverb reinforces this view: "If you wake up feeling no pain, you know you're dead."  Not very encouraging for any of us.

"LET US MAKE NO BONES ABOUT IT.  WE DO NOT REALLY KNOW WHAT CAUSES DEPRESSION.  WE DO NOT REALLY KNOW WHAT CONSTITUTES DEPRESSION.  WE DO NOT REALLY KNOW WHY CERTAIN TREATMENTS MAY BE EFFECTIVE FOR DEPRESSION.  WE DO NOT KNOW HOW DEPRESSION MADE IT THROUGH THE EVOLUTIONARY PROCESS.  WE DO NOT KNOW WHY ONE PERSON GETS DEPRESSION FROM CERTAIN CIRCUMSTANCES THAT DOES NOT TROUBLE ANOTHER.

In other words, depression is a baffling disease of the mind, one which we know little about, understand less, yet it affects millions of people.  And unfortunately, society has little room in it for moping.  Finally, he tries to answer the question how to treat the disease:

"We would all like Prozac to do it for us, but in my experience, Prozac doesn't do it unless WE HELP IT ALONG.  "Listen to the people who love you.  Believe that they are worth living for even when you don't believe it.  Seek out the memories depression takes away and project them into the future. Be brave; be strong; take your pills.  Exercise because it's good for you even if every step weighs a thousand pounds.  Eat when food itself disgusts you.  Reason with yourself when you have lost your reason."  He adds, "These fortune-cookie admonitions sound pat, but the surest way out of depression is to dislike it and not to let yourself grow accustomed to it.  Black out the terrible thoughts that invade your mind...I rebuilt myself enough to be able to keep swallowing my funeral instead of enacting it.  A lot of talking was involved.  I believe that words are strong, that they can overwhelm what we fear when fear seems more awful than life is good.  I have turned with an increasingly fine attention to love.  Love is the other way forward."  I think this is an amazingly strong and honest admonition from Solomon.

He quotes three mantras from a women who has suffered more than most (her family a victim of Pol Pot's genocide)  1. I teach them to forget; we can teach ourselves to forget the depression even though it is right there.  2.  I teach them to work, any kind of work, where they learn to do things well with pride.  3.  I teach them to love...themselves first, by taking pride in their physicality, then by interacting with others, to avoid the isolation of depression.  FORGETTING. WORKING. LOVING.

"Welcome pain, for you will learn from it," Ovid once said.  We all need pain to feel alive "but it is the walking-death quality of depression that we must try to eliminate from our lives.  There are always ways to lead a good life with depression," and the book is written as "an artillery against that depression."

Medication and therapy are the two tools most often used to combat depression; one without the other, however, is too often applied.  Both are often necessary for depression.

A sense of humor is, for Solomon, the best indicator that the sufferer will recover; exercise and diet also play an important role. And,  he adds, " A really serious workout is just about the most disgusting idea I can imagine when I am depressed, and it's no fun doing it, but afterward I always feel a thousand times better.  Exercise allays anxiety, too; nervous energy gets used up by sit-ups."

Finally, if YOU have a friend who is going through an episode of depression, do the following: "Blunt their isolation.  Do it with cups of tea or long talks or in sitting in a room nearby and staying silent or in whatever way suits the circumstances but do that. And do it willingly."

This is a book everyone should read.

Winter's Last Hurrah?

8:00

8:30 Snow

I woke up to a light snow, not enough to cover the ground yet, but it's falling.  It's now 8:00, the lake a blue from the falling snow, 33º at the moment and it may get to 39º later in the day. Right now it's a foggy, gloomy gray, and it feels like Saturday but it's only Friday.

Yesterday, I drove off to Bemus in brilliant sun and blue skies to the Bemus Point Inn at 8:00 for breakfast with three of the guys, minus two snow birds.  We have not been together for close to six weeks because of travel, so it was good to catch up with everyone.  No big news, the biggest perhaps the column collapsing at the CI amphitheater, costing quite a few dollars to fix despite insurance. After breakfast, I came home briefly before driving to Lakewood for yoga at 10:00.  Yin is always an enjoyable class, little strain, lots of holding positions for three of four minutes and a large class, with two other guys, both becoming regulars like me.

Still Fishing

Amish, Too

I hurried home because March Madness was beginning at 12:30 and I was not sure who was playing, what games were on TV.  So, I had lunch of vichyssoise and toast with peanut butter and jelly, to begin an afternoon of watching games for 10 or 15 minutes, then going off to read, do something or take a nap.  I did manage to watch the thrilling end of a couple of upsets, but waited for the Ohio State game at 5:00, a game they won also in the closing minutes.  I cannot say I am as thrilled with March Madness as I used to be, kind of an overload, like most sports when it used to be only a game or two, now you can watch ten.

A Neighbor, Lacing Her Skates

While I was wasting time watching games, when I should have been outside enjoying the sunshine, Evie was busy in the kitchen because we were having the McClures over for dinner.  The major projects, a lemon meringue pie and a cheesy cauliflower.  As usual, what seems like a simple dinner with  friends ended up taking much more time in the kitchen, even if I did most of the cleaning up, in between games.  All was done by 4:00, so we could relax until 6:30 when they came over.  We watched the lake dim, having beers and pretzels with homemade blue cheese dressing, Ron's favorite.  And for dinner, we had a Wegman's ham, something we rarely if ever serve but  have always liked when we have it at someone else's house. So, along with the cauliflower and ham, we had a great salad with pickled beets, and sweet potatoes. Everyone had two helping of ham, potatoes, and cauliflower, as we were all hungry.  It was a fun night, which we finished with lemon meringue pie, sitting in front of our fireplace.

Together Again

They left around 9:45, and we then did up the dishes, avoiding the morning mess, then went to bed after watching some TV.

I forgot to mention I bought Evie a present, just for the heck of it, six clear blue vintage dessert bowls from a shop I really like it Lakewood.  What a guy!  They are really neat and we cannot wait to use them with ice cream or fruit.  It's now 8:30 and it looks like a blizzard outside, Long Point disappearing behind the snow flakes.  It's beautiful even though it's the middle of March.

Six Dessert Bowls Giveth

Cold and Clear Skies On A Post Viking Club Morning

6:45

7:32

Another cold, 19º morning, and at the moment, 6:45, there's a pink glow off to the East and I can just make out some gray clouds, the lake shiny in parts, dark in others.  It looks like it will be a sunny day, high in the mid 30's, the kind of day we like, cold but sunny.

My buddy Stan and I went to yoga at 10:00, a really good class for Stan, as our teacher, Jen, is really good with new students, and is adapt at using props for those who cannot easily adjust to a position. Sometimes a chair is really helpful at some standing positions.  Anyways, it was a good class, and we both felt energized afterwards, as we did spent quite a bit of time on restorative positions, comfortable poses that we hold for as least ten minutes.

When I got home, Evie had made some leek and potato soup for lunches, pulled out some leftover pot roast for my lunch.  We have decided to get our upstairs bedrooms, bathrooms, and TV room painted, as it has been almost 20 years since we rebuilt our home.  We had a recommendation of a painter, Barb Johnson, a woman who lives in Bemus and she stopped by around 12:45 and spent a good 45 minutes with us, talking about options, colors, time, cost, etc.  We really liked her and she seems to have been a favorite of lots of contractors.  So, we now have the onerous task of picking out colors that complement each other.  We are thinking a different color for each bedroom, but the same neutral color for the ceilings and trim.  Does that make sense?  And what are good bathroom colors?   I have no idea.  So we have a challenge ahead of us, picking out colors we can live with for the next 20 years.

After she left, I had my lunch, watched Banshee as Evie went to work out at the YMCA, then do some shopping.  I read, took a nap around 5:00, since Evie was not yet home, I strapped on my snow shoes and went for a hike in the Woodlawn/Victoria woods.  The snow had not melted much, just shrunk and is very crusty, so despite the fact that in some places it was a foot or more deep, I did not sink much  because of the crust, like walking on a new crispy baguette.  Evie was home when I returned, having worked up a sweat, and we both then got ready to go drive to the Viking Club because neither one of us felt like fussing with dinner.

Woodlawn Woods

Verticals of Winter

It was a crazy night at the Viking because of a boat club meeting.  We were lucky, however, to get a seat at the bar.   The woman next to me, Sherry Goupil, commented on my lapis lazuli ring, and that's all it took as we then talked for the next half hour.  She moved from Hamburg to Sherman five years ago, to a 30 acre farm on Putnam Road, with, I assume her partner.  She is a semi retired surgical nurse, working twice a week in Orchard Park, just outside of Buffalo.  She is upbeat and fun, in contrast to her husband, nicknamed grumpy Bob.  She also talked about having practically adopted a young boy with Asperger's, how he is so wonderful even though a challenge.  She also loves the Viking Club because everyone is so friendly.  We have to agree.  Quite a woman.  Evie, meanwhile, was talking with another couple, Linda Smith, with her friend, Ron Willow, both long time members of the Viking Club.   We also got to now Jean and Reggie, both in their 80's I would guess.  And our friends, Doug and Dawn were also there.  So it was like old/new friends night.  We ended up spending 15 bucks gambling on a 100 dollar ticket which, unfortunately, Bob Pickett won.  I had a Viking burger, Evie a pizza, both decent and did not get home until 8:30.  It was a really fun night, especially getting to meet new people, most our age or older.

Sherry and Me

When we got home, we watched another episode of The Americans before going up to bed tired but happy from our evening at the Viking Club.

It's now 7:15 and since I was up at 6:00 and it's an amazing morning sky, I have taken at least 10 pictures of dawn, and we still have 25 minutes before the sun actually appears above the horizon. And I have breakfast with the guys at 8:00, so its a busy morning.


NEW THINK:

I liked this quotation, from Andrew Solomon, author of the Pulitzer Prize Finalist THE NOONDAY DEMON: AN ATLAS OF DEPRESSION.  He explains the importance of language (and writing), its moral purpose, and, of course, why we must read to grow as a person, to enlarge our humanity.

"Despite every advancement, language remains the defining nexus of our humanity; it is where our knowledge and hope lie. It is the precondition of human tenderness, mightier than the sword but also infinitely more subtle and ultimately more urgent. Remember that writing things down makes them real; that it is nearly impossible to hate anyone whose story you know; and, most of all, that even in our post-postmodern era, writing has a moral purpose. With twenty-six shapes arranged in varying patterns, we can tell every story known to mankind, and make up all the new ones--indeed, we can do so in most of the world's known tongues. If you can give language to experiences previously starved for it, you can make the world a better place."

A Sunny Tuesday Morning---Wow

7:05

7:40

It's invigorating to get up to a blue sky, then a wonderful sunrise, light filling the living room as Evie and I sit on our couch, enjoying dawn, our coffee, and NPR.  It's cold out, again, 19º, will hit perhaps 30º later in the day, but the 'sun is all.'

St. Patrick's Day, for me, started with yoga at 9:30,  and  I had a great savasna or falling water, or legs up the wall, to end class and left feeling groovy.  Stopped at Ryder's, for a French Press, then the library to pick up three thrillers, the the bank for cash, a car wash and home again for the rest of the day.  It was a miserable morning to be out, wet, cold, some rain or sleet, dirty snow on both sides of the road, no color, just dirty gray and soot.  It looked like a good day to stay inside, keep warm, and think about our friends in Florida!

Toasted Cheese and Jam For Lunch

Lunch was one of the all time favorites, the comfort food of toasted cheese and soup, except that the toasted cheese was made with my bread, the soup was Evie's home made vegetable and to make the sandwiches special, I always spread jam on them.  I know this sounds gross to most people, but try it and you won't go back to a simple toasted cheese  We spent part of the afternoon watching TV, Stewart and The Nightly show, reading, and I took a wonderful nap.  I woke refreshed and lo and behold, the sun came out, the sky miraculously turned blue, the lake icy white.

Bell Tower At Chautauqua Institution

Purell House At CI

Woods At CI

So, I put on my hiking boots, got out my poles, and drove to the Chautauqua Institute, hoping the roads would be clear enough to walk safely.  I would guess close to 90% of the roads were ice free, some of the side streets still had snow.  But it felt good to walk there again, to feel the cold wind on my face as I walked along the lake on the north end,  then the warmth of it at my back when I headed back to the car.  The lake at the north end is still frozen, few pockets of water like around our house.  It was a good hour walk, and I got home just in time for a glass of wine before Evie started dinner.

Vermouth Drenched Scallops (Restaurant worthy)

For dinner, we had what is becoming our favorite dinner, among many, yes, scallops with butter, lemon, shallots, and vermouth.  Evie has discovered the trick to making this a special dinner, brushing butter and oil on the scallops before browning them, pulling them out after three or four minutes, then adding the vermouth, lemon, shallots, broth and garlic.  With the sauce simmering, it was mixed with the scallops and pasta, then left to marinate for a few minutes, while the broccoli finished. I did up the dishes as Evie worked and plated the scallops and pasta, and we then adjourned to the TV room to watch a predictable, some what silly comedy, with a great cast, THIS IS WHERE I LEAVE YOU.  It did get better as it progressed and we ending up liking two the actors, the only two who seemed real, Jason Batemen and Adam Driver.  By the way, dinner was delicious. We then watched some of Idol from last week before going to bed.


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