Off To Darien, CT, To Visit The Albarrans

The White Of A Snowy Afternoon at 3:40

The Blue Of Dusk: 5:52

It's snowy this morning, as we are both up at 5:30, ready to head East, hoping for decent weather. According to the weather man, we may have a bit of snow but nothing serious.  The roads may be icy early so we going to wait till 8:00 before we head off.  We are excited to visit our daughter Beth and her family for a week or so.

Visiting The Albarrans

Yesterday was just our usual pre-trip kind of day, trying to figure out what we are going to need over the next week or so, with the arbitrary kinds of weather we might get, from warming temperatures to a blizzard.  Nothing can be ruled out, and we want to be able to be outside some with Marisa, especially if it snows.

So I spent the morning, organizing what I wanted to bring; I am getting pretty good at it after the past five years of retirement, where we would head off to visit our kids in Kansas, Connecticut, or Virginia at least two or three times a year.  What I bring mostly depends on the season, obviously, no swimming suit this time.  Two minor items, cancel the paper, and put a hold (on line) on the mail until we return.  Everything can be done via email which makes things so much easier.

Lunch was quick and easy, vegetable soup and a bagel with cream cheese, as we watched Stewart and The Nightly Show before getting back to our task, making sure the house was ready for our departure, making sure we had everything we need for our visit.  It started snowing around 2:00 and we are expected to get two or three inches tonight, then it should taper off by the time we leave for Darien.

As for me, as the day progressed I felt better, less discomfort when I would sit or stand.  I hope it continues tomorrow for our ride.  I can get comfortable when I sit, if I lie down, but getting there is the problem.  We settled down around 5:30, with most of our packing down, for a glass of wine, a farewell to the dusk at the lake.

Dinner was a replica of last night, leftover pork chops, potatoes, and apple sauce, with a great salad, with eggs, tomatoes and avocados.  Yum.  And we binged once again on The Americans, watching three episodes and finishing up Season 2 so now we are ready to begin watching Season 3, which started last week.

A light snow at the moment, 6:08, and we are taking our time before we drive off, as the weather reports are good as we get farther East.  And best of all, I am feeling better, less discomfort in my back and hip flexor.  Rest and drugs help!

Overcast, 23º, 3 or 4 Inches Of Snow Late Afternoon

8:00

I got up at 6:45, gingerly, and came downstairs to turn on the coffee, radio, and settle in on the couch just as the the lake was becoming visible, colorless, grays and dirty whites, a couple guys out fishing already.

Yesterday was a total waste, as I spent the day trying to get comfortable on the couch, on the floor, wherever my back felt better.  We were able to get into to see PA at 1:15.  He checked me over, sees no tears of serous damage to my back or groin, gave some pain killers, a steroid pack, and a shot in the buttocks. He thought it might take a week or two to heal, no skiing for a while, perhaps yoga in a week or so.  Not what I wanted to here but it does not look I have anything serious like a hernia.  To celebrate nothing serious, we stopped at the Lighthouse Grocery and had the butcher hand cut us four nice big pork chops for dinner, something for me to look forward to at the end of a uncomfortable day for me, Evie too as she has to wait on me.  Enough about my troubles.

It ended up being a pretty day outside, lots of snow, blinding white whenever the sun came out, little wind, perfect for winter activities.  Evie mostly kept up with the snow shoveling, her exercise for the day.  I have been reading a couple of books on and off, two non fiction, the other a George Pelecanos novel, set in Washington, DC, in the 1990's.  He's an easy read, great at creating the inner city drug and crime world.  The other book I am working though is medical doctor Atul Gawande's BEING MORTAL: MEDICINE AND WHAT HAPPENS IN THE END.  I have read a couple other books by him and he's a rare find, a doctor who is not afraid to 'think differently' about medicine. This book looks at how to make the quality of life better for those with age related frailties, serious illness and approaching death, not the happiest of topics.  Our only excitement of the day was occasionally taking a photo of a bird, the lake, and, later in the early evening, the full moon rising over Long Point. It would have been neat to cross country ski on the lake at that time.

Moon Over Long Point at 5:58

Moonshine

Moon Glow

We did relax for a bit with a glass of wine and commiserate over a wasted day, before Evie  breaded, fried up and baked the pork chops.  We had a salad, some leftover potatoes made into potato pancakes and of course the chops, with apple sauce, a must for Evie.  And we watched three more episodes of The Americans, catching up on Season 2 as Season 3 has already begun.  We went to bed early as we were both really tired from doing practically nothing.  Nothing more tiring than that.

I feel better this morning, less discomfort in the back, though my hip flexor is still painful, making it difficult to get up and down. I think the medicine is beginning to take effect.  I just need to be patient, rest and enjoy the day inside, hard to do.

THE CHILDREN ACT: IAN MC EWAN

A quick read by one of Great Britain's most respected contemporary novelists.  I have read five or six of Mc Ewan's novels, and ATONEMENT,  my favorite, I taught numerous times because I liked it so much. I also admire Mc Ewan for his experiments in various genres of fiction. And he always has an unexpected twist in his novels, a surprise, as in his lat novel, SWEET TOOTH, but this one I pretty much expected the ending.

This story, told in the first person by Fiona Maye, a British High Court Judge, invites us, the reader, into her court room, her mind, her home and her agonizing over various cases, as well as her home and bedroom, strange bed mates for sure.  Fiona is a self made woman, working in a very male world of British judiciary.  Her husband, Jack, as the novel opens has just announced he is going to take a mistress because they have not been intimate for mine months, reminding me somewhat of the last book I read, US, where the wife announces to her husband on the first page that she thinks their marriage has run its course. Anyways, Jack does leave Fiona, stomps out of the house, leaving her bereft, embarrassed, wondering what she well tell colleagues, friends and family.  Most annoying for me is her refusal to explain her reasons for her lack of intimacy, a  result of a case in which she had to decide that conjoined twins could be separated so that one might live.  The case left scars, most telling, her disgust with the body, hers as well as anyone else's and a lack of desire for intimacy.

We then follow her thinking as she decides other cases, most having to do with families, especially with the children of parents in the process of divorce.  In her decision making, her personal life intrudes, making it difficult for her to concentrate on the cases, forcing her to blot out all of the personal so she can arrive at a fair decision.  One case, however, is at the center of the book, the need to  transfuse a sixteen year old cancer victim.  If denied, he will die.  His parents, however, are Jehovah's Witnesses, and they view transfusing as a sin, that someone else's blood is impure, tainted, against the wishes of their God.  The young boy, Adam Henry, has been filled with the beliefs of his parents since birth and agrees with them, that he would rather die than be transfused.  The dilemma, then, for Fiona, is to balance the wishes of the parents, the boy, his religions, and those of the hospital and case worker, which differ, obviously, from those of the parents and boy.  After hearing all the arguments, she decides to talk with Adam in the hospital.  They have a lively conversation about religion, and she is charmed by Adam's looks, intellect, and innocence.  He's a bit of a prodigy and has been learning to play the violin in the hospital.  He plays a song she knows well, and she sings the words along with him, about the joys of life and love.  They seem to connect and she then leaves, somewhat shaken by him, makes her decision, and sides with the hospital as we would have come to expect.  She always takes the side of what's best for the child, not the parents,  or in this case, their religion.

Life goes on; Jack returns, and they live together, lifelessly, neither ready to discuss his departure and reasons for return.  She then  continues with her cases until her life is interrupted by letters from Adam, now in remission, happy to be alive, and he thinks he owes it to Fiona, to their brief meeting in the hospital.  Fiona, unsure of how to react, decides not to write despite receiving a couple more of his letters, filled with his life, his joy of living,  and what he owes to her.  Like most judges, she often leaves London and for a couple of weeks, takes cases in the country.  At one of the villages, in the house where she is staying, Adam is announced, and has come to ask if he could come and live with her and her husband.  He hopes Fiona could guide and mentor him now that he has left his religion and his parents.  Fiona is unsure of what to say or do, decides it's best to send him on his way, calls a taxi, and when bidding him adieu, decides to kiss his cheek but he turns and their lips meet and she holds the kiss for a moment. And he departs.

The last part of the book involves her self recriminations for the errant kiss, for how unprofessional it was, and the fear that someone may have witnessed it.  Life goes on, and she and a fellow judge practice for a recital, Fiona on the piano, he as a tenor. This seems like a holding action.  At this point as a reader, I am ready to find out what has happened to Adam, but Mc Ewan plays with us, and we watch the two practice, then have their recital spoiled only by a conversation which Fiona has with a fellow judge before going on stage.  We know it has to do with Adam but we must wait once again for the recital to end, for her to leave the recital and rush home, for her to pull out a letter Adam wrote her, and for her husband to return home.  Only then do we find out what happened, as she confesses to her husband, that Adam's cancer returned and he refused a transfusion, and died three months ago.  She blames herself for his death and wonders if Jack will ever love her as a result.  "He put his hand on her shoulder and drew her to him.  Of course I will.''  And the book ends with this lovely but sad paragraph:

"They lay face-to-face in the semidarkness, and while the great rain-cleansed city beyond the room settled to its softer nocturnal rhythms and their marriage uneasily returned, she told him in a steady quiet voice of her shame, of the sweet boy's passion for life and her part in his death." 

Wow.  I enjoyed this book, its attempt to understand a very complicated subject, the intersection of religion and man made law, and the humanness of those who have to make choices and decisions that effect all of us, and live with those choices.

A Tuesday Morning Of Red Bellied Woodpeckers

7:40

Evie was up first, for once, and now we are both up with coffees in hand by 7:00.  It's a typical morning, gray on gray, with a coastline of dark gray.  At least it's not snowing at the moment but it's very cold again, too cold to enjoy the outdoors.

A Big Boy

Sun Flower Seed

Yesterday, unfortunately, because of the snow fall overnight, at least 10 inches, I went out to shovel, carelessly lifted a load of snow, and pulled or strained a muscle in my groin and back.  Like the stubborn old man that I am, I continued shoveling, then went to yoga, hoping it might help, then to Wegmans, practically empty because of the weather, then home.  By the time I got home, I could hardly bend to pick up the groceries with out hurting.  Evie quickly got out the heating pad, some Advil, and I was sitting on the couch in no time.  No skiing or snow shoeing for a couple of days.

Hanging On

A Striped Broad Back and Red Head

Lunch was vegetable soup, another avocado sandwich, and some Jon Stewart. I did little during the rest of the day, as I could hardly move without major discomfort.  Both sitting and reclining are uncomfortable as well. In between taking care of me, Evie was out, cleaning the parking area, at least three times, as it continued to snow during the day.  And she put together a chicken gyro recipe from Turkey, allowing the chicken pieces to marinate in various spices for four or five hours.  It smells delicious just sitting there marinating.

We did manage to relax with a glass of wine, at dusk, before Evie had to go into the kitchen and start dinner, chicken gyro with feta, tomatoes, lettuce, hummus, marinated onions, and Tzakziki, a yogurt/garlic sauce.  I am hungry again just thinking about it. We then had another The Americans marathon, compliments of Amazon Prime and Apple TV.  Technology can sure be amazing, as we pulled up the series on Evie's iPad, and watched it on our flat screen TV.

I am still in quite a bit of pain this morning, so it looks like we may try to see a doctor, to make sure I have not torn anything.  This is not fun, as I cannot get comfortable, have difficulty bending to pick up anything.  Carelessness and aging do not go together.

Photo by Evie Joy, Our Neighbor's Yard (Enough Said)

Ten Inches Of Snow Overnight And Still Falling

Good Morning, Squirrel

8:00

I was up about 7:15, sleeping in for me, 16º out and a heavy snow covered house, yard and car.  As predicted it snowed most of the night and the roofs around Woodlawn have about as much snow on them as I have ever seen.  We may get another two or three inches this morning, then it will ebb and temperatures will start to drop.  It looks like a snowshoeing day as it may be too deep for cross country skiing.

After coffee, NPR and granola and yogurt, Evie started organizing for the cabbage roll stuffing, boiling the heads of cabbage, taking apart the leaves and mixing the ground pork/beef with rice.  When ready, she gave me the look, and I  got up off my couch and together, in 15 or twenty minutes, we made over forty cabbage rolls, covering them with sauerkraut and tomato sauce, baking them for an hour and a half and freezing a couple of batches for President's Weekend, saving a few for dinner.

A Sunday For Cross Country Skiing

We were not sure what to do afterwards, whether to cross country ski or snow shoe.  Such problems.  So we decided to see what the lake was like, whether the snow was dry enough to ski.  So we ventured out around 10:45, a light, wet snow falling and to our surprise the lake was fine.  When we were unable to find snow mobile tracks, it was tough going as the snow was six to eight inches deep.  But when we were able to follow some tracks, it was easy going, push and slide, push and slide.  Evie loved being out there, so we went as far as Wells Bay or Sandy Bottom, then headed back to Woodlawn.  We ran into the Kidders, a couple who also spend their winters on the lake, and their grandchildren were up from Buffalo.  By the time we returned, we were both exhausted as cross country skiing is not 'down hill,' but a constant effort to move forward, especially on the lake.  Still, we felt fortunate to be out on the lake, enjoying the morning.

When we got home,  I started the bacon as Evie was on the phone talking with Beth.  It looks like their entire family will be here for President's Day week, though Mitch and Ramiro will be visiting colleges for part of that time.  And Jill and her family also hope to come for President's Weekend, thus the cabbage rolls. We are excited and Evie's already planning menus and activities.  We had our breakfast, with espresso this time, and watched CBS Sunday morning.  Things do not change.

The rest of the afternoon was spent waiting for the Super Bowl to start though Evie found her mojo and put together an apple pie, with and cinnamon and oats topping, perfect for half time of the game. I finished David Nicholls US yesterday and as I mentioned I think, I am really enjoying Ian McEwan's The Children Act.

Dusk---No Super Bowl For These Guys

Late afternoon, we were tempted to go out skiing again but common sense took over and we stayed in and Evie put together an appetizer, Doritos's with cheese, salsa, jalapenos and sour cream, perfect for the start of the game, with a beer.  At half time, we had the cabbage rolls with mashed potatoes, then apple pie and ice cream during the second half.  The game was amazing, a series of ups and downs, as first the Patriots dominated, then the Seahawks. Then, the Patriots came back from a ten point deficit to lead, then the Hawks were on the one yard line, poised to win the game, until 'the call that will be remembered,' and a rookie intercepts the pass, clinching the game for New England.  As I said before, both teams should have won and both deserved to lose.

It was a fun, full Sunday and the Super Bowl was better than expected.  Few if any of the commercials grabbed us though, like many others, we really disliked the Nationwide Ad.  And half time was strangely dull and the the productions were the highlight until Katy Perry finally sang Fireworks and was hoisted into the sky.  Only then did I  think,  yep, only in America.

US: David Nicholls

This is the second book I've read by David Nicholls, an English writer, whose novels  appeal mostly to women I would think and me.  I loved his first novel, ONE DAY, lovely written, a funny, though tragic romance, filled with both laughter and eventually tears.  So when I saw US on the Smith Library's new fiction book shelf, I scooped it up, prepared for another good read.  And I wasn't wrong though I liked ONE DAY better.  Start with it.

No suspense because of the opening page of the novel.  Our narrator, Douglas Petersen is awakened in the middle of the night by Connie, his wife, thinking she's heard a burglar. But then he listens more closely to what she is, saying:  "I think our marriage has run its course, Douglas, I think I want to leave you.

So begins Douglas' ultimately futile attempt to save his marriage.  It takes close to 400 pages to find this out, however, as Douglas alternates between the present and his hopes to save his marriage, with flashbacks to how he met Connie, how they fell in love, the first years of their marriage, the death of their first child during child birth, the depression that followed, how Douglas saved Connie's life, then the birth of a son Albie, nicknamed Egg.  I will stop here with Albie's birth  because a large section of the novel is the tension between Donald and his son.  Albie is your typical clueless youth, self centered, rebellious, but smart enough to know that he does not want to be what his father wants him to be and he especially does not to be like his father, a scientist with a PHD, somewhat nerdy, a square in most aspects of his life.  Nevertheless, Donald loves his son and his wife, so what's he to do?

Well, Connie, his wife convinces him that they owe it to their son Albie, to take him on the Grand Tour of Europe, just the thing to repair a marriage.  Right.  Douglas goes along with it, thinking it will give him a chance to change Connie's mind.  They hit all the major cities, Paris, where their son meets up with a street musician, goes off with her for day or two, then she shows up in Amsterdam as well, no doubt invited by the son.  So the tensions escalates, Connie siding with her son (let him do what he wants) and Douglas, of course, wanting Albie to be like him, obedient, interested in museums, glad to be with his parents, and filled with gratitude for this chance to see Europe.  Not. Eventually, Douglas insults his son in a restaurant and Albie flees with his street singer and Connie and Douglas are left alone, neither hearing a word from their son, nor a text.

His disappearance ruins the trip and they decide to fly home.  At the airport, Douglas has the idea that he can save his marriage by finding his son, apologizing, and saving himself.  So Connie flies home alone and Douglas takes off, hoping to find his son, visiting Venice, then Siena, finally finding him in Madrid with the help of the folk singer friend who Albie has abandoned.  By the time Douglas finds Albie, he's a wreck, on the verge of a breakdown, and the two begin to communicate and empathize with each others positions for the first time in their relationship.  They visit the Prado, stay with each other, then decide to go to Barcelona, to see the sea.  They go to the beach, happy with their choices and Douglas gets bitten by a jelly fish, and goes back to his room.  He has a heart attack and fortunately, Albie decides to come and see how his father is doing, saves the day by calling the EMS.

Connie flies in and it takes Douglas a couple of weeks to get permission to fly back to England, a bit unsteady but a changed man.  His relationship with his son has changed as well; they both understand each other better, and Douglas is content with Albie's decisions.  Things, however, don't change with Connie and she eventually leaves Douglas, returns to her bohemian life, reconnects with her former lover, and moves in with him.  Douglas is distraught, unhappy, but eventually finds his way out of his depression.  The books ends with his remembering a woman he spent a day with in Venice, and he finds her name and number on a piece of paper.  To be continued.

Time for the Super Bowl.

Fourteen More Hours And Super Bowl Mania Ends! (Dobbins Woods, Brazils on Main)

7:30

It's 6:00 and I have been half awake since 5:00, waiting to get up at a decent hour.  It's now 6:45 and I am listening to a podcast interview of Vietnamese Thich Nhat Hanh, a Zen Master and poet, on a program called On Being. He was invited to a retreat for police officers, a seeming contradiction, the theme being mindfulness and suffering.  A little heavy for this early, a discussion of mindfulness and suffering but I have read his book, The Miracle of Mindfulness a couple of times and liked what he had to say.

We will, no doubt, spend most of the day like most Americans, waiting for the Super Bowl to start at 6:20. Before it begins, however, we hope to put together a ton of cabbage rolls and do some cross country skiing before the blizzard arrives, 6-12 inches in the next twenty four hours.  And I just read where Ohio has issued a travel ban on the turnpike for the next twenty four hours, an unprecedented decision.

I went to yoga at 9:00 though it sounded good to just stay home and enjoy a long morning.  But I was up early enough so I had a good two hours before I had to leave, time to write my blog, have breakfast, and a leisurely coffee hour.  Class was full, a Mixed Level, so it was more rigorous than most so I found myself struggling at times to keep up.  It was a  good class, however, and I felt energized ready for a cup of coffee at Ryders Cup, than shopping at Wegmans, stocking up for Super Bowl Sunday and the coming snow storm.  I thought for once I had actually remembered to get everything on Evie's list, however, as Evie pointed out, I bought buttermilk, not butter and milk.

Evie Joy

When I got home from yoga and Wegmans, Evie was clearing our parking area again, a never ending task because of the snow.  Afterwards, we decided it was too nice to stay in Woodlawn and drove off to one of our favorite places to cross country ski or snowshoe---Dobbins Woods, a ten minute drive.  We were not disappointed because Saturday's walk was even more spectacular than Fridays, because of the plethora of hemlocks, branches weighed down by the heavy snow, sending snow down our necks as we brushed the limbs skiing by.  What a great day to be out in the woods, warm enough so we were not cold, a heavy snow, blue skies peaking through the trees.  We were out for a good forty five minutes, on a hardly used trail, so it was rough going at times in foot deep snow, a good work out is the way we look at it.

Hanging Evergreens

Dobbins Woods Rocks

We had what's becoming our lunch, homemade vegetable soup and cheese sandwiches on homemade bread.  Yum.  We watched some Stewart and The Nightly Show, then just enjoyed the rest of the afternoon, both of us tired from our morning in the woods.  And I was sore from both yoga and cross country skiing, as I am not used to this much exercise.

Brazil's On Main, Westfield, NY at The End of the Evening

We were excited about the evening because we were going out to dinner with Linda Hepp and Ron McClure at one of our favorite restaurants, Brazil's On Main, in Westfield, about 15 miles north of our house.  We have been there a couple of times before, so we knew we would enjoy it.  We picked up Ron and Linda at 6:20 and our table was ready when we arrived at 6:45.  The restaurant was packed with happy people, enjoying their food and drink, the ambiance of being in a busy place. The tables are a bit close, as it's not a large space, but we were comfortable enough.  We had a hard time deciding on what to order and when we finally decided, all four of us on the special, a strip steak with bourbon sauce and mushrooms, we were told it was sold out.  Rats.  So we had to go back to the menu, and find something else we liked.  Evie had salmon, which she has had before and likes and I had scallops with a risotto, also quite good.  The McClures had tenderloin and a flat iron steak, both also good.  It was a fun evening despite our disappointment with the special.  There's something exhilarating about being inside, on a cold, winter evening, surrounded by people enjoying their evening around a table of food and wine with friends.  Conviviality fits the evening.

We were home around 9:45, an easy drive, no snow, roads cleared, and watched some TV or read for a bit before going to bed.  A full day, of snow shoeing, good food and friends.